when you got to leave, you got to leave

04 Sep

it took me almost 1 yr to get over the loss of 3 colleagues from end 2008 to mid 2009. suffice to say, i dont deal very well with losses. but, ive grown to realise and understand that when someone makes a decision to leave, the decision is made. no one can stop them. if one day i decide to leave, nothing anyone says will keep me. as harsh as it may sound. the sad thing is, im actually starting to believe in what No 1 always says, “no one is indispensible”. thats true. a company cannot run if someone is indispensible. there always must be someone else who can do the job. if not you, there’s someone else. after KM left, i thought his legacy will remain forever. childish right? so when i asked the then sec 2s, whether they missed KM, they said, “why will we miss the DM?” and it occured to me that there are ppl who never got to experience what KM was really like. likewise, there will be ppl who will never get to know what someone is really like once she leaves. there will be ppl who will never get to experience her. there will be ppl who will never get to be mentored by her. there will be ppl who will never know she existed. to think that at the end of it, this is what everyone’s life becomes. a passing phase. at the end of the day, we are just one person who can be replaced.

i cried today. even in public. it pained me that much. and yet i understood that the decision was made. and nothing anyone says will matter much. shouldnt matter much anyway. because i might, one day, too. but, losing ppl is not something im good at. it is still sad.


Posted by on September 4, 2010 in i-Cry, i-Reflect, i-Sad


3 responses to “when you got to leave, you got to leave

  1. Guay Hansen

    September 4, 2010 at 9:29 pm

    So who’s leaving today?!?

  2. ck

    September 5, 2010 at 12:03 pm

    We’re never a passing phase, just like how the ones around us impact our lives. They may be gone, but they leave behind sets of footprints, and our lives are never ever the same again.

    At the end of the day, we always leave something behind in others’ life, but it’s not all the time that we are aware of.

  3. misspegasus

    September 5, 2010 at 11:07 pm

    footprints left behind. i know. but the emotions of missing that person and stuff like that… im really not good at that. i hate it when i have to feel like im losing someone… and yet its impossible to be ‘together forever’……. sigh…. actually, i understand why, and i know why. i just need to deal with it…

    sometimes it fears me.. and i wonder, have i done enough or made enough impact to leave footprints in others’ lives.. i dont know.. oh well….


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