feels like the weekend already

tomorrow’s a half day. and im lazing around at home. ive got 2 classes of mock paper to mark, 1 class of maths test; all of which ive promised to return asap. but apart from the sec 5 mock paper, i have the whole of 1 week holiday to mark the rest. hence, the laziness.

bro is watching gladiator on tv. and i hate fighting shows.

mom is moody. she’s been moody since yesterday. im not quite sure what triggered it. but… for the whole of yesterday, bro-mom-me spoke less than 20 sentences to each other altogether. the whole of yesterday. thought she’d be ok today, but she doesnt seem like she wants to talk either. and in moments like this, i dare not ask her what happened…….. so….. hmmmmmm………. kinda tense at home, all of us just keeping quiet. TV’s making the only noise there is, except from the sound of the keyboard im using to type this.

its teachers’ day tomorrow. i cant say im eagerly looking forward to it as i did during my first yr in teaching. its different. my thoughts and feelings are different.

perhaps, sometimes i wonder whether 1 day of appreciation is what teachers really want. i’d like to think that most ppl become teachers not for the appreciation from students. but rather to make a difference. so, the best gift for a teacher might be to see a student under your charge to succeed and do well in life and go places. what else could make a teacher more proud than to see her student doing well. (what to do, its a giving profession). but of course, we still appreciate the holiday and the thank you cards.

ive not been to chek jawa or semakau for a few mths already. was checking out the seagrass blog yesterday and i really want to go again. soon. i miss the waters. and next agenda on my “i-live-my-life” list would be to learn diving.

so i finally started my personal FB account. one without students and existing trs. we’ll see how many ppl i add………. being a rather private person.

anyway, with term 3 ending, there’s only 3 weeks of sch left. after that its back to AARs and meetings and budget planning and crap stuff to settle for 2011. another year has passed. time is running out.

im seriously considering studying, there are just so many things i need to think abt. to the extent of stepping down or requesting not to take sec 3 classes next yr. maybe. i dont know. not knowing whether im making the right decision. and im kinda worried telling my parents for various reasons… but we’ll leave that to later.

next monday is an impt day. you’ll know why next monday…

next week i was supposed to have  gone on a fieldtrip to tioman. fully paid for by MOE. but………………………………… sigh, the approval from those who needed to give me the approval came in too late. next year, i’ll apply. and this time, ive learnt that i need to pester those that need to give me the approval….

so its been a really random post……. and the title not doesnt fit the post. but, who cares…….

i got to go and finish off the iris johansen book. due date is wednesday and im not even half way through the book because of internet-related distractions and study-related activities… so, goodbye…

 

a moving sand dollar

ive seen sand dollars, but never seen moving sand dollars….

this of course is a time lapsed video, so its not exactly moving in the speed it normally does. its fast forwarded. nevertheless, its amazing to see it moving..

 

lessons from Ramayana

“There never was and can never be a deer of gold. yet Sri Rama went in vain pursuit of one. Surely when calamity is imminent, the judgement if first destroyed” – Sri Vyasa

 

the brightest star in the night sky

venus is the brightest thing in the sky, after the sun and moon. because of its orbit around the sun and its trajectory, there are times when venus is particularly close to earth. in fact, there’s no planet that gets any closer to earth, at a distance of 38 million kilometers!

this pic from nat geo shows a trio – venus, jupiter and moon on dec 2008.

now, as bimbotic as this might sound, i was really quite mesmerised by the bright light tonight. AK told some of us that venus was really bright. so i went out of the hall during the last few minutes of night study and stood by the corridor and watched the bright light shine so beautifully.

so forgive me if i feel like saying it’s a star, cos it really felt like a diamond in the sky…. and despite all the darkness in the sky and minimal light pollution, i kinda felt blinded looking at venus…………

here’s MY shot of venus……….. (sony cybershot) – its the closest i could go..

Photo of planet venus, taken from Singapore on the 25th of august 2010, 8pm.

the amazing brilliant white gaze from venus was quite soothing…. and it felt good to end the day with a mesmerising sight-seeing mini-gathering.. apparently, the planet is brightest just before a sunrise or just after a sunset. so indulgent it was to watch the bright light become slightly dimmer (but still bright nonetheless).

did you know, that while the earth rotates every 24 hours, venus rotates once eevry 243 days! thats long. and that makes venus one of the slowest planets..

interestingly, because of its rotation, the sun will rise on the west and set in the east on venus. how cool is that!

 

Protected: maybe, someday.

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the YOG Swimming Experience

wah………… like WAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

just check out all the toned bodi…………..   swimming is such a mesmerising sport. and today i got to experience an international swimming competition at the venue itself…

this is the scoreboard…

this is how close the cameraman goes to the athletes…

though the venue seemed much too small to hold enough crowd for an international sports meet like THE OLYMPICS, the crowd was screaming (mostly girls from secondary school) for the singaporeans! Rainer Ng made it through the semis. the relay team didnt make it. and amanda didnt either. but hey, we all still love them still just because their bodie….  just because they put in their best effort!

this video is the 3rd and 4th swimmers of the Men’s Relay. Australia did so well for the first few laps. they were ahead by over half a body length. but in the last lap, russia came from no where and won gold.

i swear the aussie supporters just stopped breathing for a few seconds and stood in shock. actually the aussie swimmers were too. after they came out of the pool, they just stood and watched the score board and wondered, “how did this happen”…. quite sad for them…

was an interesting experience… though quite frankly, im starting to feel symptoms of a developing headache cos of all that noise……. going to sleep…. good night world…

 

too tired to think of a title for this post

mom will be back this friday. so obviously, ive got to get the house back in order. i will be going for YOG Swimming finals tomorrow. and wednesday, i intend to sweep and mop the house 1 more time. and clean the kitchen. and do the laundry. and thursday we’ll be having dinner outside so that we dont mess up the house after a hefty clean up.

so, today was like the preliminary. i cooked black pepper prawn. and no… dont get all excited that i can cook. its just the sauteed with black pepper sauce that you can find in any supermarket. i cooked 4 vegetables, enough to last my bro for tomorrow. and bro and me on wednesday.

major sweeping and mopping (3 times) of the house. and soaping of the floor of the kitchen and washing and mopping it again. and cleaning of the stove with mr muscle. wiping clean the sink……… phew…

i feel like ive exhausted all the energy i accumulated from having the best term-time weekend yet.

through these 2 mths of having to look after the household, you’d think that i will help my mom next time. but no…. you see, ladies tend to have their own way and time of doing what they need to do. and my mom and i have differing views of how and when to do certain things. so, yes, ive repented, but…………. i’ll just let my mom do what she needs to do whenever she wants to do it.

but!!!!!! i really want to wash my hands of looking after the household..

really appreciate my mom for doing that for the past 30 yrs….. its not easy.

its a mundane job that requires very little brain juice. and yet, it has to be done.

almost everyday i cried because of my mom…. (well, i had to cook, and indian food never goes without onions…. tears just rolled out everytime i had to cut onions!)

now that she’ll be back, i guess things will be back to normal. normal meaning she’ll be nagging at my unwillingness to help out in household chores, working late, not doing something abt my life, feedig me weird medicine which i’ll accept for a few days and then rebel and months later she’ll start all over again, etc…………. but still, i really appreciate my mom. and i’ll be really glad to have her back home. cos this household cant do without her. she holds the family together.

 

the most relaxed weekend during term time

its not as if i didnt go back to sch on yesterday. i did. i even had 2 groups of students for IP coaching, from 9-1pm…

after that, i left, reached home, it was almost abt to rain. i smiled. it felt so good to be home, clean and dry and smell the weather just before it rained.  the YOG opening ceremony kinda ruined the mood, but still, it felt nice to be at home, with no agenda. 4NA marking over. of course students didnt do well. but hey, what else was i supposed to expect. after the sec 5s disappointing performance, i figured, i can handle all other disappointments from other students. 

so i didnt let that affect my mood. i was far too relaxed to let that bother me.

sunday was fine too. had to go to bbdc in the early afternoon. after that, i stopped by sheng siong to get some groceries and decided to walk back home. thank goodness the weather wasnt bad to me.

i took a slow stroll, crossing the road. near the drain, i saw 2 small pigeons pecking on some feed. even as i walked close by, they didnt fly away. that might have been the closest ive ever gotten to pigeons.

the last time i was that close to pigeons was way back in 1990s, when there used to be so many pigeons on grass patches below HDB blocks. all the aunties, including my mom, used to throw small bits of bread crumps, or scatter rice so that the pigeons had food to eat. and when i ran through the pack of pigeons, they’d fly away hurriedly and gather again just moments later at a nearby spot. watching and waiting for the threat (me) to leave. ha… talk abt old days… when simple things made us smile.

so anyway, even though i was walking alone, i smiled heartily to myself. a big smile happy that i got to walk right next to 2 beautiful birds at such close range.

back home, bro had gone out. dad had gone out. mom’s still not back from overseas (argh!). i was alone.

sometimes ppl miss out on the simplicity of just having time for yourself. i decided i’d have instant noodles for dinner later so i didnt have to cook. and i sat down to watch YOG matches on TV. read my iris johansen book.

now and then i’d steal a peak at the quiet house. i dont know abt how i’d feel in the future, but today, a house with no one made me feel so comfortable. its not abt the loneliness. its abt being alone. i could hop to the kitchen. i could lie anyway i wanted on the sofa. i could change the TV channel how many ever times i wanted whenever i wanted. i need not compromise for anyone.

maybe thats being selfish. and maybe thats why i appreciated this weekend. i dont know why i felt so light hearted. of course, occasional sad thoughts did flash past my brain, but i still felt light hearted nonetheless. i dont know why. but its rare that i feel so carefree and i wish the feeling would last longer, but hey…. reality has got to touch down somehow right…. i get all my sec 1/3 common test papers tmr. and tmr’s the week mom gets back home, so i got to clean up the house too… ugh…

but still, the best weekend yet…. right in the middle of a term…

 

Letter from Home

Please send us postcards from the sky
and tell us if it’s really blue.
Your father says, “don’t touch the sun”
Your gran knits sweaters one by one.
Your sister has your room. Each night
she crouches at your windowsill
and watches out for you. But still
no word? Is airmail postage much too steep?
What classes are you taking now?
And are you getting enough sleep?
Can you keep warm? Do keep a scarf.
But i shan’t nag – you are old enough
to take care of yourself. We miss you lots.
The budgies have stopped singing, and their shelf
is strewn is fallen fathers. Once you’d flown
we lit a candle for you, and it drips
and flickers – Oh, i’m just being glum.
it’ll get you down. You’ve left the nest
empty, but it’s for the best.
How thrilling for you it must be
to finally study overseas!
Icarus, our darling boy,
we’re proud of you. Do send word home
and send us postcards of the sky.

Love, mum

                                                                                                                                  Grace Chua

found on the wall at Esplanade. and it speaks volumes on the mom’s everyday thoughts abt missing her son.